Today

It is Saturday, and I have the whole day free.

If anyone reading plays EverQuest, I'm on the Saryn ( Mithaniel Marr ) server.

I drank coffee at Muddy Waters at 16th and Mission today. Then, I wasn't feeling much of anything in the cafe, so it was a half hour before yoga class started, and I made it to class, and now I feel real good now. I was sore from yesterday, and my hamstrings needed stretching out. Plus, one of my favorite cute girls was there, and that is always nice. I never talk to any of the girls in class, I figure they have their own lives, and if they wanted to talk to me, they would.

We had a substitute today, she does a good job. Like cake without the frosting, though. She isn't one of my favorite teachers, but what she had us do today was really good. Just a nice, easy, and relaxing class. There were a lot of people there today. I guess it is still the New Year's Resolution people, but they begin to drop off in February, I've noticed.

She's kind of a downbeat yoga teacher. Somewhere deep inside, she has the blues, I can feel that.

Anyway, I feel great as a result of her class. Makes me feel alive, so that is something. Much better than feeling all stiff and sore all day. I feel fluid now, and that is pretty yummy.

I know someone will eventually read this. It's just like youtube, where I didn't know who in hell would watch my videos, but people have. I have 118,000 hits so far, with no promotion whatsoever. Most people watch some of the music videos I've made, but maybe more will watch the art stuff. I don't think they are all that great, but they are getting better. I know what I'm doing with the videos at least a little bit more. It's fun to make videos, I enjoy going through the process. I bought a 1.5 TB hard drive to store all the videos and photos, still learning how to use this hard drive. I'm still such a noob when it comes to computers.

Lately, I've been going off the hook watching videos featuring Alan Watts, Noam Chomsky, Carl Sagan, George Carlin, and Howard Stern. These guys keep me entertained and happy for hours. Hey, when you live in an underground basement studio, you need lots of content to keep your mind going. I still like books, I have to read more. Videos can only do so much. You need books, because they help you to think better, whereas tons of videos can leave you a little confused.

I don't have a job right now. Well, I do, I'm a working artist. I just don't get paid, and that will eventually become a problem. I can survive for sometime, but it would be nice to make some art sales, or have a stream of income primarily for the purpose that I can keep doing my thing.

I've been at this art thing for a long time, twenty plus years, and I am just getting started is how I feel inside. That's fine with me. Every day is a new day.

The kind of art I want to make always involves naked ladies as my source material, but lately, I've used no imagery whatsoever. I've had a problem with imagery lately, just wanting to spread colors around with a brush. I've been accused of making 'therapy art', and maybe that is true a lot of the time. I don't care if that is true. Sometimes it isn't. I do make art for myself. If I'm not entertained by my own art, why would anyone else be? If Neil Young can write a song for himself, their is no reason why I can't make a painting for myself. Same thing.

I reconsidered H.R. Giger. He is very talented. I love his work, but each artist has to find his own way, that is the way, the inward journey, and if I follow the path correctly, my art shouldn't look like anyone else's, what would be the point of that? There's only two kinds of art, just like music, good and bad. I like to simplify to that point, makes everything easier on me.

I figure I have nothing to lose at this point.

I like to write, I know that. I'm probably embarrassing myself with this entry, but I seem especially good at doing that with every opportunity. It's all part of the risk factor, I suppose.

I'm honest, at least I'm that. It's gotten me into trouble in the past, but it is better than being a goddamn liar.

Meanwhile, my Lizard Man Iksar named Scummy Bababooeybukaki is fighting skellies in Crescent Reach, where he has a skellie of his own. ( 'Skellie' is common online lingo for skeleton. )

Anyway, I bought a bottle of beer last night, but I never got around to drinking it. Maybe I will today, who knows? I like to drink once in a while, even though I do yoga, but hell, I still smoke everyday. I like it. Now the world knows what I do, but who cares? Better than hiding something from people. I don't have anything to hide, except when I'm writing or drawing at the cafe. I don't like people looking over my shoulder when I am working, do you?

It's funny to me thinking that this will actually be read by someone someday. It might be me. I write for myself, too, same as my art. I've given up trying to please other people, it's impossible. I do what I want creatively, and that is the only reason to do it, especially after having art teachers be on my ass for years. I don't care anymore what they think. I had some good teachers, though, and I will always remember those. The others can just go into the recycling bin.

I don't want to teach. I have nothing to teach anybody. All I need is some wise-ass kid to remind me of how I was. hahaha.

I figure at this point that all I am is some kind of entertainer. I make and provide content, and give something of myself in the process, so I can go on with my life. I guess this is my harvest today, come what will. I'm not even done yet. I'm just exploring the medium of blogging.

It will be fun to see what happens, but as is my experience, probably not much of anything. That's fine, I'm used to that. I don't know what I expect anyway.

Maybe I'll make some coffee instead of dipping into the beer just yet. I've got EverQuest to keep me happy for a while, and I look forward to talking to one of my brothers later, so I am going to have a good day, and thanks for reading. Hopefully, I won't have to edit too much later, and I'll leave talking about masturbation for another blog, that will be a rather long entry, hahahaha.