"My Oldest Brother Drives Me Insane"

     I told him I was going to get some coffee, and he said, "Bon Appetit", thus wishing me to enjoy my meal.
     I did not say I was going to have a meal, so why should he wish me to enjoy it?

     Maybe he was just being nice, and was hoping that I would understand that he wanted me to enjoy whatever I was doing.
     Maybe, he is illiterate in both English and French.

     So this is how I started my Monday, and my week, with a g-mail chat with him.  Same old thing, same avenues of thought.
     He wants me to learn 'Final Cut Pro' when 'Windows Movie Maker' works just fine for my purposes.  He wants me to make $50 an hour.
     I don't see why he doesn't use 'Final Cut Pro' to make $50 an hour.
     I always feel like he is trying to push something onto me, which all I can think of, is the projection of his ego onto me, in order to validate what he is doing.

     I ended up drinking a lot of coffee today, getting really tweeked.  Then I smoked a lot of cigarettes.

     I was thinking today how I needed a therapist, someone to talk to once a week, about anything that came to mind.
  
     I attended my evening yoga class.  My teacher asked me if I had been doing my homework, of  'two sun salutations a day'.
     I said, 'To be honest, no.'
     'How long have we known each other?'
     'Two and a half years.'
     'That's a long time, but who's counting?'
     She was cool, for at least I was honest.  I felt guilty and bad for not doing my homework, though.
     

     'Thank you,' she said after class.
     'For being honest?'
      Laughing, she said 'yes'.

     My halfling druid reached level 25 today.  I paid my internet bill.  I saw a blond girl with huge cans in a white t-shirt, and she was a delight to behold.

     I look at a lot of women.  I can't love just one, that is impossible.

     Generally, I feel better now.  I got some food in me, and the yoga class helped me to relax.

     Oh yeah, here is the comic strip I made right after I chatted with my brother on gmail.


     What a day.  There is more to tell, but I have said too much.

     The words flow out, and I can't think of how I'm supposed to react to someone who I think is crazy.  Maybe it is better if I don't talk to him.  I've been fine lately, just going about my business.  I don't need him to tell me what I need, or don't need.  It's all about him anyway.

     I am not a psychologist, or a therapist.  I am not a psycho-analyst,either.  So, I don't know what to say or do.

     Does he have ADD?  Does my other brother have ADD?  I don't know, I'm not a doctor.  My best guess is if you get twenty to forty minutes of exercise a day, and don't eat McDonald's, and don't drink soda, and don't live a sedentary life-style that you will probably have a little less Attention Deficit Disorder.

     All this shit drives me crazy, because then ADD becomes an excuse for everything.

     I would guess that people in my family aren't the best for taking 'personal responsibility for things'.  I am no exception.

     So, basically, I am having problems today trying to think all this shit out.  I can't do it.  I can't even understand how I am supposed to react when confronted with craziness.
     I just try and chill out, and kick back, and get away from it.

     Women drive me insane, too, but in another way.  They are beautiful to me.  Nothing wrong with that.  I just like to draw them, and look at them.  They are pleasing to my eyes, especially after seeing a bunch of naked guys in the locker room at the gym, and that is not a pretty sight.  Just based on what I saw today, I can honestly say, 'Yeah, we evolved from apes.'