Artist's Depression

Nothing going on in my life. Suffering from Artist's Depression, or it could just be 'David Depression', or 'Family Depression'. Hard to tell sometimes.

I took a high energy yoga class today, too. I just wasn't into it much. Didn't feel like it.

I just took a little nap, while listening to a Biology lecture. That was nice.

I attempted a blog before the nap, but didn't want to burden anybody reading the blog with my depression thoughts.

I ate keische today. I don't know how to spell it. I just tried to find it in the dictionary. No luck.

I am starting to feel better after painting a little.

My brother was a little down yesterday, so I cheered him up, but I feel blue today. No explanation for this. Could be for feeling this way today is I've been coasting on savings for some time, and I have to gear up to make some money. Then it is a battle with self-esteem issues, and trying to feel good about yourself, and just hoping that someone responds to my artwork, or what I do on Facebook, and youtube, it makes me feel good. Any kind of reaction, even if they hate my stuff, that would be better than the constant apathy towards me and my work. Maybe it's my own damn fault for being too much of a dick all the time to people. I can't explain how I am or how I act or behave sometimes. I often feel like I'm the musical equivalent of a hurdy-gurdy box. Maybe I should learn to play something. It can't be that hard, with practice.

A musical instrument might make me happy, who knows? I have plenty of guitars around here, don't know what my problem is. I just feel happy with the painting.

My body needs liquid. I feel like eating a salad, or some fruits and vegetables.

I want to watch cartoons, but I am happy learning about algae from the biology lecture.

No one to talk to right now. Have to wait for people to get home from school or work. Most people don't get to do what they want every day, all day long. I'd like to keep doing this, but I guess I could use some funding.

I have to try something to keep this all going.

I'll feel better in a little while. Just happens sometimes. We'll see how it goes.

Everyone gets the blues sometimes. It's a part of life. The challenge is to pull yourself out of it a.s.a.p. and to fight it.