God, I'm so pissed.  I don't even believe in 'god', and I hate when people say 'god bless'.  It drives me nuts, especially when used as a farewell.
     Anyway, I just got back from the cafe.
     I was the angriest today than I've been in a long time.
     I was pissed off by this man who sat next to me.  He was using his laptop, and then his cellphone right next to me.  He didn't give a shit about what I was doing.  I was trying to make art.  He just did not give a fuck.  Then, he was just getting in my way, in addition to soaking up all of the creative energy in a twenty-five foot radius.
     I was angry because I had just sat down to work, and within five minutes, this guy sat down, and ruined my mood.
     Then I had to stew in it for a fucking, goddamn hour until he finally left.
     I said 'hello' to him initially, but then he doesn't say anything about my art, or what I'm doing, and people like this, they just stare at you, if they even bother to fucking do that.
     God, I'm so annoyed.
     Then there was this lesbian and this young man, and they did the move which is..."Let's look at the stuff on the wall, and then passively end up near the working artist, and bother him."  I hate that.  I like people who make a decision to walk up to me and introduce themselves like a normal person, with some decent questions.  Anyway, I didn't like this couple because they didn't hate the crappy art on the wall, so because of that, I didn't want to talk about my art.
     Then there was this beautiful black woman in a chocolate striped dress.  She didn't bother me, but I was still glad when she left.
     Then there were two young girls and a boy, and they didn't bother me.
     But the first man, maybe he was Chinese American, he bothered me.
     Then Black Comic Book Guy showed up.  He is the one who used the phrase, "God Bless".  I pretended to shoot myself in the head, and fell on the sidewalk after he said it, I was 'soooo annoyed'.
     The Fuck.  What a day.  Then it was mother-fuckin' hot, which wasn't bad on account that it helped my art pieces to dry, but for me it was being in a steam room, and I wasn't in the mood for that.
     So, I bought a beer, and a grape drink, and maybe I can start to relax and calm down.
     Sheez.

     Thank god for this blog, because I can fuckin' swear on it.  At least I think I can.  I don't think this one is monetized anymore, as it has been deemed 'for adults'.

     Teen-agers swear a lot.  Adults do, too.  Most people swear every day, so I don't know what the problem is.

     Anyway, so I painted to blow off some steam, and I am still not done yet.

     Then there was that woman who wanted me to do storyboards at some point in the future.
     "Maybe there is $1000 in it for you somewhere down the road," she said.
     "Yeah, right," I thought.
     My grandmother told me never to work on speculation, to always get money down, and a contract for shit like that.  Otherwise, it is all talk, and impossible to get paid.
     The woman is kind of cute, though, that is the problem.  But, she is crazy-mad.  I've seen her from time to time over the years.  She's been in my studio before.  I've drawn her.  I'm glad she seemed to be doing well, she even had a laptop.  In the past, however, I've seen her tweek pretty hard.  She is so damn cute, however, I don't know how she manages.
     She said she is leaving in a week, so she got my email.
     I could have worked on storyboards with her for the last two years if she had wanted.  Who wants to work with anybody via email?  It sucks.  I'd rather work directly with a person, otherwise, it is hard to care unless the money is there.  But at that point, it ain't art, it's a job, and who gives a fuck.  Some jobs aren't worth what they pay, esecially with artwork, because it always takes longer than expected.  Always.

     So, yeah, I'm still pissed, but feeling a little better.

     I lost in Magic: The Gathering last night, so I am still pissed off at that, and at one of the players, who decided to play an uber sliver deck, which pissed me off.  Then combine it with the hot sun today in the cafe, and annoying people, and now I"ve got the rage of The Incredible Hulk.

     Just how it goes, I guess, but yeah, I am really pissed, mad, and angry.  I even made some art about it, but I am not done yet with that at all.

     It took me a couple of hours to even laugh today.  I still don't want to laugh just yet.  I am still so fucking pissed.
     I am going to hang onto this anger, and use it for fuel.

     I haven't written on this blog for a while, because I don't know what I can and can't do.  It is frustrating.

     What I want on the web someday is a place where I can do whatever I want without some company to edit me. 

     I just want total freedom.

     I already have enough problems with editing myself, wondering what people will think, if they even care at all.

     I don't like it when somebody stands over my shoulder.  It creates too much pressure.