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Friday, December 23, 2011

The Beginning of The End

     I think I am fucked.  My check was supposed to be here a week ago, and it still has not shown up.  That means I have no money to survive until that check comes in. 
     Yes, I think I am pretty much fucked.
     This is most unfortunate.
     An encroaching sense of doom is starting to come over me.
     I have to do something.
     I don't know what it is.
     The despair is starting to come over me.
     I haven't felt that in a while.  Life has been good, but suddenly, it isn't.
     Ooops.
     I have no back-up, and no resources.
     I am starting to feel real bad.
     What am I going to do?  I don't know.
     I have no talent, and no abilities.
     I am screwed.

     My check was supposed to be here a week ago.  Actually, the bank was supposed to drop the money into my checking account.  That has never worked.  They usually mail it to me.  They didn't.  There is a bizarre slim chance that the check is in my studio, but no, I don't think so.  I know what the envelope looks like.

     This is the end, my friends, unless I get that check.

     I have no way to survive.

     No one is going to give me money, I have to earn it, but yeah, where the hell is my check?  Do I have to go to the goddamn bank and bitch at them?  What good is that going to do?  I don't know.  All I know is that my Christmas is ruined, and it sucks.

     I need a course of action besides just sitting here at the cafe and bitching about it.

     I am confused about what to do.

     I need help.  I don't know who to turn to.

     There is no where for me to go, except to hell.  I guess all of my enemies can laugh at me, and that will suck bad.

     Shit.  I am definitely fucked.

     I am starting to have knots in my stomach.  I can't write with this gnawing feeling.

     I guess I could find a job, but doing what?  Being a mindless laborer?  Living a life where I am a slave, depending on paycheck to paycheck?  An indentured servant?  That might be my fate.  How unfortunate.

     It is The Beginning of The End.  It is going to be a great story if I get myself out of this one, my friends.  I will write all about it if I can survive this one.

     Our Hero is currently in great peril, and it is very perilous.

     Reality has just done great damage to me.  At least thirty points of it.

     I am hanging on for dear life now.

     I am at the end of my rope.

     So, the mystery is...where is my goddamn check?  And why hasn't it been delivered?  Fuck, I have every right to be pissed.  This is my life here.

     I am not too happy with my bank right now.  Maybe I should go over there.

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