Doom, etc.

     I finally took a shit, and the girls,...the women...are still talking, after two straight hours.  It's amazing.  They haven't taken a goddamn break once, and what the fuck they are talking about, I have no fucking idea.
     Anyway, I am at the cafe on a Friday, and there is not many people here, which is good.  I'd really be able to think if the girls weren't chatting so much, or another solution would be if the music was turned up more.  Then I could groove to that.
     Anyhow, I have a quest.  I have to go to the internet store and pay my bill.  I am late like a son of a bitch.  It is all my fault, too.
     Then again, I have lost a lot of money with my investments, so I am doomed in that department.
     I am fucked, and I did it to myself, I guess.
     It would be in order if I could get a job, with something I like to do.  Something I am good at.
     Well, my options are minimal.
     I am hoping to get my internet turned back on today, but I don't know if that will happen.  I hope it all works out for me today, otherwise it will be no fun for me at all.  No games, and no porn.  That will suck.  I will actually have to use my time to clean, and perhaps even work on my art.  Gasp.
     Anyhow, it is going to take a hell of a long time in order to get this or any of my other blogs going.
     This blog has over 7000 hits, and most of those hits are from me, I assume.  I have had hits from other sources, so that is good.  Despite it being set to 18 and over, it apparently seems as if people actually click on this blog from time to time.  That can only be good for me.
     In youtube terms, 7000 hits is nothing.  I get a thousand hits a day on my youtube channel a day.  Meanwhile, it has taken over a year and a half to get this blog going.
     The first blow to this blog came when they took away the ability for it to be monetized.  I don't blame them.  I didn't know that the material I was doing couldn't be monetized.
     Yet, I am proud of this blog.  I let loose, and try and make it as literary as I can, while at the same time putting up any nudity that I can.  Trust me, I haven't even begun with that.  I haven't even put up pictures of my own dick, yet, lol.  Neither have I put up crotch shots of porn stars.  I wonder how the third-party content works for porn, though.  I don't know if it is really okay to put up pictures of women getting fucked on this blog.  Eventually, though, I am going to have to risk it, and to see what happens.
     Basically, I want an art smut blog where I can do whatever I want.  I want to feel free to create, and I want to get away with whatever I can.  That is my goal.  If Playboy and Penthouse can do what they want, then why can't I?  I don't see what the big deal is.
     Unfortunately, time is growing short.  I have to take care of my errands soon, and that is a drag.
     Yeah, without this blog, I would have to do my private stuff at home, and in secret, and no one would see it until after I die, if that.
     It still feels like the middle ages, where backwards thinking is still the rule of the day.  It also feels like I am doing something naughty, whereas, in actuality, it is all just normal.  Kink.com is just around the corner from where I live.  People get paid for all kinds of sexual things there.  I saw a cute brunette yesterday in a violet mini, with her Kink.com hoodie.  She probably had a good day's work.
     It is amazing how many people are involved in the sex industry.
     Anyway, it is funny, because porn people can pretty much go around unrecognized.  No one recognizes them with their clothes off, haha.  It is true.  Plus, they often go around in conservative clothes, so no one would ever guess the sluttiness involved.
     Anyhow, I am going to have to figure out how to get a job.  This is a dismal prospect for me.  I don't know how I am going to do it.
     Eeeek.
     I don't know what I got that people want.
     I write, and I draw, and the quality of my material is questionable.
     I have a growing audience on youtube for my video making.  That is really nice.  I have worked hard on that, and I am reaping the rewards.  I have new ideas to come for videos, too.
     I love making videos.  They are relatively quick and easy, in comparison to some painting that takes forever.

     One problem is this laptop.  It doesn't really dig my camera set-up.  It would rather have a 2.0 connection.  That limits my video making at the cafe.  It sucks.
     If worse comes to worse, where I can't get my internet to work at home anytime soon, I will have to rely on what I can do at the cafe.

     Anyway, I have to go to the internet store soon.  That is my big errand for the day.  I must succeed.  I must not fail to do this.  I need my internet.  It is the only thing that keeps me sane.

     But yeah, I really need a job.

     Maybe I will do some comic book work, who knows?  I am not very good, well, I could be if I worked harder on it.
     The only thing to do is to do some comic book work on the web, and to see what happens.  I have nothing to lose.
     It's not the easiest thing to do to make a video, however.  Comics take a very long time in order to make them look good.
     Also, I am going to have to learn computer colors.  It is possible.  I actually do like the bright colors on the animations, and on things like The Simpsons.  It all looks very nice.

     I have my Conan The Barbarian book with me.  I was reading that.  I like Robert E. Howard's prose.  It feels complete, and epic.  I feel like it is a secret pleasure reading Conan.  I know Stephen King isn't the biggest fan of Conan, I don't know what his problem is.  I like Conan, that is all that matters.
     This King Conan comic book I read yesterday turned out to be okay, but there was a picture that looked like Frank Miller's Batman on a horse illustration.
     Comic books have a co-dependent strain in them.
     It is kind of a messed up world.
     On the other hand, comic books are a wonderful medium.
     Just like everything else, the advertising mucks it all up.
     Robert Crumb doesn't seem to have advertising in his comics. 
     I wonder how he does it.
     Maybe he sells enough comics.  He's been selling the same ones for thirty years, maybe that helps.
     Man, that makes me want to do something.
     As usual, I have my work cut out for me.
     To think, I used to put all this energy into my sketchbook, or on a typewriter.  Now I can publish instantly, for all to see.  That is really bizarre.  It is 'wow', I can't believe it.  It is really nice, I like it.  Also, there is a chance that someday I will get paid for all of my blogging activity, if I can become popular enough.
     Now, to write an actual book within all these blogs, well, that is going to be another thing.  I've thought that I can just do it in small chunks, and maybe someday I will have enough collected material to do something with, you never know.
     I sure am able to generate a lot of words on this blog.  I wish it had a word counter, that would be cool.  I wonder how many words this entry is?
     I started to count, but it would take too long.  I want to know, though, but there are other more important things to do than counting words.  I used to have to count words on my essays, to make sure I had enough.
     I tell you one thing, it sure is easier to generate words on this laptop external USB keyboard than anything I have ever typed on in my life.  It is rad, convenient, and easy. 
     We are all so lucky to have tools where we can generate words easy, as fast as the mind can produce them.

     Aw, shit, it is getting late.  I am going to have to go soon.  That sucks.