My coffee is gone

     All I know is that this blog keeps getting hits, and that is amazing.  It is a slow ride, though, much slower than youtube, yet I am fascinated at the same time. 
     This is my baby project, just to see how far I can take it.
     This is by far my favorite blog, and the one I can really wig out with, and go to town.
     I don't hold back much on this blog, well, not much.
     There are some things I don't talk about.
     I am mostly a wild horse let loose here, though.
     It is a dream come true, and I can do whatever I want.  That is very nice.

     Anyway, I am at the cafe, and I got my coffee, and some good hard clean blues going with some thick harmonica and voice.  It sounds good.

     A man who looked like he fell off the boat into the sea, and swam to shore, well, he is here.  He is a slightly disturbing presence for me, like some kind of non-player character just occupying space instead of activating it.

     Anyway, it is a good day.

     You know, writing takes time, just like everything does.  It takes a lot of time.  It almost takes too much time for what you get out of it by the end of the day. 
     At least with a painting, you get something to look at.

     I often wonder what the point of my life is when I choose things like painting and writing as a profession.
     I do these activities every day, and so far it has resulted in squat for me.
     Just how it goes, but I also know that I have to keep plugging away, and maybe something will happen.

     I was thinking of writing a free-form dialogue today.  I like doing those, it is fun.

     So, I've got The Twilight Zone, Magic The Gathering, Books, Comic Books, Video Games, DVDs, and all kinds of things which influence my daily output.

     I am actually going to have to sell something if I actually want something to happen.

     I guess I could start sending in stories to magazines so I can get rejected.
     I am an amateur, though.  All I want to do is put porn segments in the middle of the stories, for no reason at all.
     It would be funny to have a serious drama, and then the characters get down to some serious fucking, and then the play just goes back to normal.
     As a viewer, I would want to see that.
     Haha.
     Too often, I wonder if fictional characters even have a pulse.
     As far as I know, men are always on the look-out for the next score, and television characters should reflect that.  It is what men's lives revolve around.
    
     I'm partly kidding, sorry.

     Anyway, as my flagship blog, it is interesting to see how this one is branching out all over the world.
     How in hell does this blog get translated?  Is it automatic?  What actually happens?  I don't know.  I guess I could research it if I was interested in it enough.

     Time for a fag, I mean, a smoke.
     The British like to call cigarettes 'fags'.
     I think it is funny.

* * *

     Thank god that the blue jacket man finally left.  I wasn't enjoying his presence.  It seemed to be a vacuum of space and mind, and quite purposeless, even though he had his portable device with him.
    
     I was able to urinate finally.  I can't think when I have to piss, I can't do much of anything until that feeling is gone.
     I often think that if I did not have to piss in the morning, that I would never wake up.  I would just live in dream land forever.

     My friend didn't have much to say today.  He was occupied with thoughts.  We had a good laugh about the food box that fell from the sky and decapitated a guy giving a comedy routine in the Philippines during WWII with Rod Serling in attendance, but that was about it.
     Now he is gone, probably figuring out what he is going to do today, same as me.

     Well, I got some more 'Clone Wars' to play today.
     The thing with that game is, you can never have enough money.  It kind of sucks in that regard.  No matter how much money I earn, I always need more.  It never ends.  I just want to build stuff, and it takes so long to make all of my architectural dreams come true.  I come up with some pretty expensive, all-out projects that require 20,000 credits a day easy to keep upgrading.
     There is no end in sight.
     I keep seeing things that could use improvements.
     The lots do look pretty cool when there is a lot of stuff on them.
     My Mustafar lot has quite a bit of lag on it, due to all of the lights in my swimming pool.  The other day someone reported to me that he had no lag at all on that lot.  I guess he has a faster computer, and better internet.

     Anyway, what else did I want to write about?  I don't know.  All I do know is that I need more coffee.

     You know, those actors on Babylon 5, well, they have a lot of boring lines that they somehow need to bring to life.

     Brent Spiner, who played Data, had a lot of lines.  It is commendable what he did, and made it all seem easy.

     I've never been good at memorizing lines at all.  Even when I memorize something, I don't seem to be able to retain it all too well.  Add a live audience with it, and I'm just not all that good.  I'm not an actor, nor a memorizer. 

     Another man, who is preparing to sit down, well, he had to pick the table next to mine.  Then I noticed he was looking at me.  Then I turned to look at him looking at me.
     I'm sure he will encroach my space more anytime soon.

     I am glad I am interesting to people every now and then.  They seem to be interested in me for whatever reason, or combination of things.
     I am glad I am intriguing.
     Granted and true, I am somewhat of a freak, no matter what I do.
     It is just what I am, something different than the average bear.

     The guy risked looking at my screen, but I caught him looking.  Why in fuck should he care about what the fuck I am doing?  I don't know.  Why do people go to cafes?  I don't know, to be around people.  That is why I go to them.  I like to watch, though, not be watched.  I'm not a performer.  I'm an observer.  I don't like to interact much, but I like to see other people interact.  That is entertaining to me on some level.  I don't want to be a part of it, though.

     I am building up a good rhythm now with my typing.  I can do this for hours.  All I need is coffee.

     So, with a blog, it doesn't really seem to matter what I write.  There is no critical dialogue going with anything I do, so I don't see what it matters what I write, as long as I fill up space.  That is about all that matters.

     I haven't really had a single comment on any of my blogs, so I don't know what anybody things, if they even bother to read anything I write, and I highly doubt that.

     The television script business must be a tough one.  Reject after reject.  Why should anyone in telelvision produce anything besides what their friends in the business write?
     In other words, I don't stand a chance, for anything, in this world.  That is sad.

     In order for me to launch a career, my content has to be so rad, and so intensely great, that everyone will adore me.
     Well, you know what?  It just isn't going to happen.  Not by a long shot.   I mean, who cares about what I do?  I'm a nobody.
     I'm still just waiting to be discovered, I guess, so I will keep hammering away.  It is much better than being a construction worker with a real hammer.  I would rather do this.

     Well, then it comes down to the matter of, well, I have to write stuff that people actually want to read.  That is a tough one.  I am not a polished writer; in fact, I am far from it.

     Well, my next job is figuring out what my next piece for youtube will be.  I like the 'Frankly, my dear, your vagina smells like soggy cardboard' idea.  That is funny.  I like it a lot.  It won't take me too much time to produce, either.

     Odd to think of things in terms of 'production' instead of as 'art'.

     Scripts have to be things that can actually be 'produced', things that actually can be realized.
     Well, I was reading about 'Avatar'.  I still haven't seen that movie.  I would like to see it now, right on my monitor at home, on the dvd, with all of the special features.
     When you see a movie these days, well, it is not complete without all of the special features.  I would rather just watch stuff on dvds.  It's better than the theater experience, because I can smoke while I watch them, just like people did in the 40's of watching a movie, and smoking during the movie, and sometimes, making the movie theater catch on fire.
     Anyway, I want to see 'Avatar' now, just to see what the big hoopla was about.  Okay, blue people and special effects.  Okay, gotcha.

     I am in this guy's peripheral vision, and he is in mine. 
     Man, this is no fun.

     I can sit here and suffer with these writing conditions, or I could go home and not write.
     I hate to stop when I am in a groove, though.

     Anyway, my coffee is gone.